THIS IS THE DAILY UPDATE PAGE*
Do you care what is going on in my life right now, you should.
October 3, 2005: Hi Sara!!! Yes I'm this big of a dork.
July 7, 2005: Did you know that they are putting swear words in the dictionary? Yeah and the big ones too, not just the double meaning ones like "bitch" or "damn" (even damn isn't really a swear word) but the big ones like the #@?* or $#!* and the british ones I use all the time too. Bugger, sod, bloody, and even knotted is in there. Well at least the Oxford Dictionary has all of them in there, I don't know about the American dictionaries. But I mean where did we get our english from? Thats right, the English, or the Great British as Mok would have me say. I say it's about time it is. If its a word that is used by the general public daily, then it should bloody well be in the #@?*ing dictionary. $#!*, they're used on TV so you know it's got to be a real word.
May 8, 2005: So my chair smells like meat. I have this leather chair that I bought for thirty dollars at Office Depot (it was a good buy, but it doesn't lean back) and it smells like cooking meat. I quess because it's leather but still, it's rather disconcerting. Why? Because for the last few weeks I thought it was me that smelled like meat. That's not a smell that really makes a good first impressiong. The best I could hope for is I were to make whoever I'm talking to hungry. Luckily it's not me, it's my chair.
April 29, 2005: When did clouds become lucky? I don't remember looking up in the sky and seeing a cloud and saying "Wow, a cloud! It must be my lucky day." Wouldn't everyone then have he same luck? Explain this to Lucky Charms Cereal. Obviously desperate for new lucky charms they've made clouds lucky. What about pennies, or stepping in dog $#!*? Those are supposedly lucky, why not make charms out of them. It's all taken a dive after red balloons.
April 22, 2005: Ten bucks says that Johna did not pick up the flea bomb. Any takers?
April 22, 2005 (supplement): Ten bucks says Ted is an insensitive ass. Any takers?
April 20, 2005: It's 6:00 do you know where your Ted is? I do. He's watching the food network. Specifically Rachael Ray's Thirty Minute Meals. He's addicted. Something about her (besides that she cooks the way I cook, no baking). I think it's that she's a dork. She's kinda dorky. Makes stupid jokes yet somehow you still laugh. Granted she does say "Delish" which can be a little annoying when it's over and over, but it's made up for by the "yummo"s and the "awesome"s. And the fact that almost everytime she says "E.V.O.O." she follows it by saying "Extra Virgin Olive Oil". "I'm just going to add some E.V.O.O., Extra Virgin Olive Oil and some..." and then she'll do it again in the same show. Damnit another flea! Sorry, sidetracking bastards. Anyway, she's great. Can't get enough of her. Doesn't hurt that she's easy on the eyes.
April 17. 2005: I have two new commercials that I love. The first is a Sprint commercial where a family is on a beach and they are talking about how their daughter, Wendy, is being blamed for increasing overages on their phone bill. But Wendy suggested that they change to Sprint and the family forgives her. So the Sprint guy looks over and says, "Good call Wendy." and she smiles and says "Thank you" and then gives her family this look of disgust, but not just any disgust it's that teenage girl look of disgust. You know then one, where they scrunch up the face and let their jaw hang down and make that back of the throat exhale. The one that sounds like "auchk." It's just so funny the look. Maybe because when I was a teenage girl I used to give the same look but I just think it's adorable, in a truly annoying and pathetic way. It just makes me laugh. The second is an Adelphia, or maybe it's cox, I'm not sure but most likely only a few (or one of the two of you) know what I am talking about. It's the one where the two women are standing in the que at a bagel shop and one turns to the other and says, "Huh, could this be any more dial up?" Funny but the best part is there is a dad pushing his two children on a merry-go-round in a park and one of the girls says to her dad, "Faster dad you're being dial up." For some reason it kills me. It's the way she says it. Like any normal little girl, but it so funny when she says it because the dad gets this look on his face of "oh geez, here we go again" Or maybe it's "Faster? If it weren't for child abuse laws I spin this so fast your eyeballs would get sucked out your @$$, you stupid whore." Or maybe it's the first one.
April 15, 2005: Cooking with Mrs. Dash. Everytime I use it I think of the Mr. T theme song. You know the one that I'm talking about. The old saturday morning cartoon show that he had where he was a gymnastics coach and they would somehow go on some mysterious adventure on the way to a gymnastics meet. Like the one time that their bus broke down and they got stuck in some ancient Egyptian tomb and had to eat a snake to survive. And then at the end of the cartoon the real Mr. T would be sitting at some park picnic table and say some sort of wisdom akin to those"The More You Know" things like: "Just because you don't eat snake everyday doesn't mean that they aren't people too. I pity the fool that uses drugs." That's good television. But the theme song, oh the the theme song. "Mr. T!!! Duh! Duh duh! Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh, doo doo doo doo doooooo, duh duh duh duh duh duh duh, doo doo doo doo doooooo. Duh! Duh duh duh, Mr. T!!!!" Oh you know how it goes. Fine then download it. I'm sure it's somewhere. Anyway. Everytime I open the cupboard to grab my Mrs. Dash all of a suddent it's , "Mrs. Dash!!! Duh! Duh duh duh! Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh..." etc. Neh. You love it.
April 7, 2005: I have fleas. Damn cat left fleas in my room and now I have fleas. Obviously Ted tastes just as good as cat. Hmmm Ted Chow Mein? No. I spend half of my waking day scowering the floor for fleas. The lucky ones I find get a nice swim in the toilet before their final resing place in Davey Jones' Locker. Who the hell came up with "Davey Jones' Locker" for a bottom of the sea analogy? How is that a locker? And who the hell is Davey Jones? Whatever. So I hunt fleas. It's become like a personal vendetta against them. Ha! I just caught one right now as I was typing this, make that two. Bastards, I am not a buffet! Freaking parasites. As God is my witness I will outlast them. I think I've gone crazy. "Wake up Leona!" Kudos to those that got the reference.
April 5, 2005: Even though I cannot put my updates on the internet until I have internet again, I will continue to make them. They just won't be seen until I have internet again. So...yeah.
February 26ish, 2005: I'm writing this in april but it happened sometime around the 26th of February so I'm dating it as of then. Mok got me a cool birthday present. A Mcbean.net T-shirt. He had it specifically made for me. Mok is the best. It's cool it has Larry standing on the front and underneath him it says, "What the #@?* !". On the back it says "Mcbean.net" Well, I think its cool.
February 14, 2005: Feb-U-ary. Not, Feb-RU-ary. I don't care how it is spelled. It's not freaking Wed-NES-day is it now? NO. It is not. Right. Wait, crap! I already did a post like this two years ago. Oh well. So I hate Valentines day. With a passion. Indeed a passion that burns in my soul like a, like a... like a- oh what's the bloody word I'm looking for? Like a day that makes me want to weep like the little boy that I am. Not one word but oh well. (Deep sigh). I'm not looking forward to the next few weeks. It just keeps getting harder. Right then. Mcbean Dot Net is back and due to not having a home and not wanting to turn this website into a sob story-fest the updates will still be few and far inbetween but at least they will come.
February 14 (supplement): Wah wah wah. Cry me a river you baby. Just shut up and update, and keep it funny, none of this deep sigh crap.
January 19, 2005: Thank you to those who cared what was going on in my life at the moment. Cheers.
November 18, 2004: The word "dude" is the greatest word ever invented. It is a language all unto itself. Unfortunately I cannot convey that language in writing because it just looks like this: dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude. I could make it more like duuuuuuuuude, but still, not much there. You can start and finish every sentence with dude. "Dude, what the hell is the daily update all about dude?" "Dude, I don't know dude." "Dude." "Dude." Dude indeed dude, dude indeed. Dude.
November 11, 2004: Prospective Christmas presents for Mcbean. Nothing. Even though there are new Duran Duran, Tears for Fears and Hall and Oats albums out this year. I repeat, there are new Duran Duran, Tears for Fears and Hall and Oats albums out. But I don't need anything for Christmas, except maybe for some more Mcbean.net fans. Hi to the both of you by the way.
November 9, 2004: The Christmas season is already beginning with decorations in every store window, Christmas music playing in the stores and the almost official sign of the Christmas season being here, Santa Pack Coca Cola bottles are now on the shelf. The "Official" sign that the Christmas season is here is of course, none other than... the Honey Nut Cheerios® scrooge commercial. Yes, that is the official sign. It ain't Christmas unless I see that commerical on TV. Just like it ain't Easter until I see a Cadburry Cream Egg commericial. My favorite one being the one that hold the Cadburry Bunny auditions. A true classic. Just like the bee and scrooge commercial. I watched a lot of TV as a kid.
November 3, 2004: After the events of yesterdays election I feel I can no longer be silent about what is going on with this administration, as you may have noticed with the last post I made right underneath this one. However I do not want this to become a common theme here at Mcbean.net. I originally created this sight to be a comically themed sight and not one of political views. Therefore I am creating another section as of today called "Re-eflection". This section will be my outlet to all the political crap I see going on and feel I must comment on. Re-efletion will be a seperate entity of Mcbean.net but will still have the Mcbean.net name attached to it simply because I don't want to have to pay for another domain name. But now my anger can be put in a different area and not tarnish the less than popular name of Mcbean.net. Already a new section of the forums is up with the Re-eflection name on it, but once I speak to the almighty Hailwood maybe I can see about getting that seperate as well. I hope this does not deter the three people who occasionally look at this website from coming here anymore. Your patronage is valued.
November 1, 2004: "If you feel your party has gone too far to the left, I ask you to come stand with me." Why on earth would anyone who is a democrat go stand with Bush? "Oh no, my party is way too liberal now, I think I'll vote for the conservative party because thats closer to the way I think". Look at it this way. Take a ruler, put Kerry on the 1 inch line (or actually the 0 inch line to be nit-picky) and Bush on the 12 inch line. Say I'm a 4 on the ruler scale as far as liberal democrat. If I feel Kerry is too far closer to the 1 (or the 0), it's still closer than the 12!!!! Why would someone go to the further extreme which is farther beyond their beliefs than the opposite extreme of which I am closer to? It boggles the mind. Well what can I say, either side would say anytbing to get a vote. One is confident, one is scared. I guess we'll find out sometime around Christmas... maybe.
*daily does not necessarily mean "everyday"